Generous spaciousness is a posture that is needed more than
ever. In a world of instant
communication where people can react and respond within seconds, perhaps
without taking time for reflection or prayer and with the convenient protection
of anonymity, harsh polemic is more often the norm than is generosity. It is easy to be black and white,
self-righteous, arrogantly certain, and loud with your judgments when you don’t
have to put your name to your opinions.
When there is little to no chance of accountability, you can throw out
statements without really thinking through how they might affect others.
Generous spaciousness invites a different kind of
discipline. It seeks to intentionally
make room for the reality of multiple perspectives. It seeks to extend the benefit of the doubt
that different conclusions are held on the basis of convictions that have been
thought through and prayerfully reflected upon.
This of course is not always the case.
Sometimes people hold opinions that they’ve never risked questioning or
challenging. But generous spaciousness
at least wants to expect the best of people and encourage an environment in
which people will be invited to risk internal critique and challenge their own
assumptions and attitudes.
Jesus, himself, recognized that people could study the Scriptures
and miss how they revealed him. In John
5 he says, “The Father who sent me, confirmed me. And you missed it. You never
heard his voice, you never saw his appearance. There is nothing left in your
memory of his Message because you do not take his Messenger seriously. You have
your heads in your Bibles constantly because you think you'll find eternal life
there. But you miss the forest for the trees. These Scriptures are all about
me! And here I am,
standing right before you, and you aren't willing to receive from me the life
you say you want. I'm not interested in
crowd approval. And do you know why? Because I know you and your crowds. I know
that love, especially God's love, is not on your working agenda. I came with
the authority of my Father, and you either dismiss me or avoid me.”
We see this again in the story of Jesus walking with
the disciples on the road to Emmaus after his resurrection. He goes back to the Scriptures and reveals
himself to them – Scriptures that they knew inside out and backwards and yet
had never seen how they pointed to a Messiah who would suffer, be killed and
then be raised from the dead.
People read the Bible all the time and see what they
want to see or see only what they’ve been taught. We are prone to this kind of tunnel
vision. The apostle Paul says, “For the foolishness of God is wiser than human wisdom, and
the weakness of God is stronger
than human strength.”
That’s why we need to engage with Scripture from the
starting point of Jesus Christ. Any
interpretation of Scripture that isn’t Christ-like ought to be questioned and
deconstructed. Generous spaciousness
seeks to be Christ-centered. It is meant
to be a posture that nurtures a Christ-like ethos. That’s why it is more important to us to call
people to come to know Jesus more deeply than it is to argue about six or seven
texts that address same-sex sexual behavior.
If we look at those texts without knowing the person and character of
Christ, we can think we are being very wise and intelligent from a human point
of view – and still be missing the heart of Christ for gay people. Our best wisdom may indeed be foolishness.
Jesus responded particularly and uniquely in each
personal situation he encountered. In
this we see a generosity that meets people where they’re at, acknowledges that
different people need different kinds of space and time, instruction and
direction, invitation or challenge.
Jesus, himself, embodies paradox and tension. He both challenges the status quo and upholds
the ancient tradition. He used Scripture
in a way no one had ever encountered before – and while some believed and
marveled at his wisdom and power, others were offended, angry and refused to
acknowledge his teaching. Jesus, in
response, wept over the city of Jerusalem and expressed his care by saying, “Jerusalem, Jerusalem, you who kill the prophets and
stone those sent to you, how often I have longed to gather your children
together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her
wings, and you were not willing.” And at
his crucifixion, Jesus implored, “Father forgive them for they know not what
they do.” He embodied a profound sense
of generous spaciousness in extending care, grace, and forgiveness without
coercing or demanding that people accept and follow his teaching.
Jesus embraced children and affirmed child-like
faith. He warned anyone who would be a
barrier to such faith that it would be better if they put a millstone around
their neck and threw themselves into the sea.
Jesus, it is well known, had dinner with the wrong kind of people,
touched the wrong kind of people, had conversation with the wrong kind of
people, went to the wrong places, triggered and exposed social taboos, broke
dividing walls, and announced a new kind of level playing field. The apostle Paul summarized this way of Jesus
by saying, “Be kind and
compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved
children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice
to God.”
My
friends, I implore you, on Christ’s behalf, to be kind and compassionate to one
another when this topic of homosexuality comes up. Extend grace and forgive one another. Walk in the way of love. Be willing to give up your right to be right
for one another. Give one another room
and space to engage with Scripture, to encounter Christ, and to receive his
love. Because as hard as it may be for
you to accept, people who know and love Jesus and care about the Scriptures may
come to a very different conclusion than you do – and either one of you could
be wrong.
I
recently suggested three breath prayers to an individual who had developed a
very strong sense of self-sufficiency.
This individual had endured a lot of pain and brokenness in his journey
and in response had built a very strong coping system. But his coping system essentially could make
no room for generous spaciousness. It
was a system that both helped him and yet limited him in experiencing the
healing and rest of God.
The
first breath prayer was, “I am the Beloved child of God”. This prayer invited the person into a posture
of receptivity. When we are strong and
confident in our own abilities, our own intellect, our own strength, or our
capacity and competence, it is very difficult to receive all that God wants to
give us. So it is important that we
learn new ways of being and new ways to be receptive.
The
second breath prayer was, “Be still and know that I am God”. This prayer invited the person into a posture
of reprieve or rest. Many of us who have
built elaborate strategies to cope with the challenging realities of our lives
maintain very high levels of vigilance.
Our minds are always at work. It
can be very difficult to find a reprieve from the scripts that run in our
heads. This breath prayer invites us to
focus on our breathing and becoming still and resting in the confidence that
God is God and we are not.
The
final breath prayer was, “Lord have mercy on me a sinner”. This is a shortened version of a very well-known
prayer from the desert fathers. This
prayer invites a person into a posture of relinquishment. When we are willing to acknowledge that we
are in need of mercy because we fall short of fully relying, trusting and
depending on God, we relinquish the pride, fear, and striving that so often
mark our attempts at navigating our own lives.
Relinquishment can lead to deeper faith.
Receptivity,
reprieve, and relinquishment all invite us to enter a sense of rest. Many of us are weary in the arguments and
attitudes that surround the debates around homosexuality. Some of us are weary of trying to figure out
for ourselves what we believe and how to best be faithful in response to the
question of gay relationships for Christians.
Some are confused and threatened by the many different opinions and
strong positions held by different people.
Our hearts can feel battered and bruised. We may find it difficult to know how to best
love ourselves and others. In the midst
of this tumult, we need generous spaciousness.
We need receptivity, reprieve and relinquishment to help us to enter a
deeper rest.
It is
our desire, through the work of New Direction to nurture this kind of space – a
space to find the rest of God, to rest in his love, to rest in his grace and
mercy and to extend that rest to others.
-WG
-WG
As one of the weary ones, once again I find strength and encouragement here ... thank you, Wendy Gritter and New Direction!!
ReplyDelete"My soul finds rest in God alone..." Ps. 62:1
Judy - so many of us are weary in this particular conversation - but it is a restful joy to encounter one another and to support one another along the way. Holding you in my heart and prayers sister!
ReplyDelete"Jesus, it is well known, had dinner with the wrong kind of people, touched the wrong kind of people, had conversation with the wrong kind of people, went to the wrong places, triggered and exposed social taboos, broke dividing walls, and announced a new kind of level playing field."
ReplyDeleteAnd then He told them to "go and sin no more".
and unless you want to change people's moral views on homosexuality there may always be a certain level of stigma on the behavior of somebody who is actively practicing homosexual behavior .... why? because it's been a historical believe that such practice is morally wrong... so unless you want to change historical teaching there will be the odd self righteous individual who relies too much on their own self sufficiency and to me that is really sad because they may very well be more lost and more broken and more ashamed of who they are then somebody who's authentic and honest enough to describe themselves as being gay or lesbian... who's the one who should be pittied? Certainly not the one who's doing the best they can to live their lives the best they know within the given circumstances of their own personal experiences... placing that aside, again, lgbt folks are not as marginalized both inside and outside the church like years before.
ReplyDeleteWhy people argue and debate over terminology is beyond me because it actually masks the real issues at hand. It's not the lack of acceptance of individuals who happen to be same sex attracted but rather that the church is growing to accept homosexual practice as being morally affirmed in scripture and the fact that there still exists some churches out there today who not only teach traditional views of scripture but also organizations out there committed to discipleship and walking with people out of homosexuality and at the very least helping an individual towards living their life through the lens of their faith not their sexuality. It's an individuals choice if they choose to call on such organizations for moral guidance and spiritual direction. terminology may always be used diversely like it always has been.
Can someone please describe this organizations position on whether or not embracing one's same sex attraction and adopting the homosexual lifestyle is sin - in like one or two sentences? No essays please.
ReplyDeleteNew Direction does not take a position on this question. We acknowledge that Christians differ and therefore view this as a disputable matter. Our focus is to keep pointing people to Christ, and to nurture safe environments of dialogue, peace-making and the pursuit of unity in our diversity so that Christ will be glorified, the church built up, and our witness will actually be based on love.
ReplyDeleteThere certainly is a degree of subjectivity to this topic. I like the part about pointing people to Christ, nurturing safe environments for dialog and pursuit of unity in our diversity. What boundaries do you place around this domain of diversity? What framework do you use to decide when a diverse behavior is outside of the bounds of what is acceptable? I recognize that my past perspectives on homosexuality have been un-Christian in many ways and I want to repent, but there have to be some boundaries otherwise it seems like you devolve into amoralism, which is incompatible with Christianity.
ReplyDeleteHi Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteI've tackled this in a previous post that you can check out here:
http://btgproject.blogspot.ca/2012/01/generous-spaciousness-grace-for.html