Tuesday, November 13, 2012

how we can find unity in our diversity .....


Today’s post, after a long period of silence on this blog due to an inordinate amount of doctoral work, is in solidarity with Justin Lee over at Crumbs at the Communion Table, his synchroblog, and in celebration of the launch of his new book, “Torn: Rescuing the Gospel from the Gays vs.Christians Debate”.

Justin has asked us to share some thoughts about how to positively address the ongoing polarization caused by this issue.  Let me begin by saying that I think it will be the lives of gay Christians that make the most significant difference when we look at this matter with history on our side.  Gay Christians ARE the bridge.  It is as people build relationship, share their spiritual journey as mutual pilgrims, and celebrate the gifts, passions and Kingdom contributions of each other that this disconnect within the Christian community will dissipate.

But even more specifically, I think there is one significant point that the church needs to grapple with and own if there is hope to move forward in a peaceable way, in a way that is able to experience unity in our diversity.  It is a simple concept really – but one that people seem to have such great trouble accepting…..

“People who love Jesus and care about the Scriptures come to different positions on controversial matters.”  And because of this reality, this fact, we need to be reminded that at the end of the day it is only God himself who perfectly can judge which position most closely represents his heart, his intention, and his will.  That means that all the human participants in the conversation need to embody a humility that acknowledges that their best reflections on the question of whether marriage is an appropriate expression of faithful discipleship for gay Christians are incomplete and imperfect.  We are called to wrestle with Scripture, do our homework, study, read widely, pray deeply, contemplate, seek wisdom, exercise discernment, test our conclusions, consider context, access the resources of reason including those from the disciplines of psychology, sociology, history, anthropology, biology, and philosophy, and engage in diverse experiences in the lives of followers of Jesus who are gay.  And once we have invested in such a process, we are still called to a place of humility that acknowledges that we are guaranteed to NOT have the perfect interpretation on this matter – because no human being has the perfect interpretation.  That means, in a nutshell, that we can open ourselves to conversation with those who have also gone through this process, and who have arrived at a different conclusion than we have, and have the grace to listen well, anticipate God’s presence in the dialogue, and trust fully that the Holy Spirit can and will continue to lead, teach, guide and direct us towards a God-honoring response to the very real and personal dilemma that gay Christians face. 

Because at the end of the day the majority of Christians do not face this as a personal dilemma.  They are not trying to discern, because of their sexual orientation, whether they should prepare to live a single, celibate life, or whether they should open their lives to the possibility of making a covenant commitment to an intimate life companion through marriage.  Most Christians think about gay marriage as a theoretical idea.  It costs them very little.  My challenge is that, at the very least, the price all Christians ought to pay is the willingness to humble themselves and simply acknowledge that they could be wrong – and that those who disagree with them may be just as vibrantly committed to Christ and just as robustly honoring of the Scriptures as they are.


I hope that many, many Christians will pick up Justin's book and be part of a hope-filled, love-filled, and unity-focused response to the pluralistic reality in the Body of Christ on the question of gay marriage .... and that we will all grow up and learn in deeper and richer ways what humility-shaped justice really means.

-WG

7 comments:

  1. Thanks for this post! I agree that, given that the only thing we can be sure about is that we can't be sure about anything, that what's more important than being "right" is being gracious to those with whom we disagree.

    I especially liked this statement:

    "My challenge is that, at the very least, the price all Christians ought to pay is the willingness to humble themselves and simply acknowledge that they could be wrong."

    It's frustrating when a majority of straight Christians continue to promote the traditional view as if it is the only legitimate biblical interpretation, when they haven't truly studied the issue. Especially since it doesn't affect them personally, it is unfair for heterosexual Christians to maintain a non-affirming position without considering the other options.

    I'm going to be writing about some of these issues on my blog soon; do you mind if I reference your post?

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  2. hello "A" welcome to "bridging the gap". thanks for your comment. yes, feel free to reference this post - and do send me a link to your blog once you've posted.

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  3. "Most Christians think about gay marriage as a theoretical idea. It costs them very little." Definitely. I am a straight Christian, trying to be an ally, and I'm realizing that I need humility because I don't have a clue what I'm talking about. For me, it's just a hypothetical question to debate about- so I need to LISTEN to ACTUAL gay people and trust their opinions above my own.

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  4. hi 628. i should mention for those who may be new to this blog, that i write as a straight ally who has invested the last decade of full-time ministry engaging with LGBT persons. willing to be humbled is one of the main things that has allowed me to sustain my role in this work for this long....

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  5. The thought that God could have a place for gays is very interesting to me.
    As it stands, it has been hard to see my way through this all.
    I always ask God why--although increasingly I find myself less and less eager to blame God when some gay person suffers bigotry. I dunno why.

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  6. P.S.
    I also despair at the know-it-alls who know nothing.
    Forget gay marriage, I wish these straights would be humble enough to actually listen to our stories.

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  7. Wendy wrote: "Let me begin by saying that I think it will be the lives of gay Christians that make the most significant difference when we look at this matter with history on our side. Gay Christians ARE the bridge."

    I understand this statement and feel like I have a pretty good feel for why you say this is so. AND I find it utterly galling. No, I don't mean to shoot the messenger, nor do I question the truth of your assertion. It's just that I really, really, REALLY hate this reality.

    From my perspective it's not the anti-gay horrors embraced and practiced by certain brands of Christianity that are the root of the problem - or even what has caused me the most personal grief. Homophobia, in my opinion, is only the symptom of a deeper flaw commonly practiced by Christians: the fundamentalist mindset. And by "fundamentalist mindset" I mean the arrogant stance driven by harsh adherence to a literal use of "no man comes to the Father but by me" - and all those stupid "One Way" traffic signs I drew as a teenager either pointing up or to a cross.

    I understand that gay Christians might be the bridge for a conservative Christian to walk more tolerant steps toward someone like me (or at the very least soften their attitude regarding what legal rights they feel entitled to withhold from my family)... but I don't perceive this as a two-way street. For me this is more of a double-chasm.

    Assuming we can get beyond the whole drama over me being who I am, there remains the other drama over the fundamentalist Christian need to "fix" me because I have no interest in being a Christian. Which alienates me from gay Christians as well.

    In other words, I am so hideously repulsive to some kinds of Christian that they don't even see my valid humanity until they can come to grips with the gay subset of Christian that also doesn't see my valid humanity because I don't share belief.

    Ugh. I am really that evil? :/

    If I'm going to be perfectly honest here, I can see how my resentment contributes to the double-fire gay Christians receive - from Christianity on the one hand and from the LGBT community on the other. I must also confess I'm not terribly sympathetic - especially if I feel I'm being judged, yet again, by another Christian (even if gay).

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